Ann not enjoying a ‘hands free’ experience on a suspension bridge with Dodja.
Over the years Ann has become Adventure Guide’s poet laureate. We have become accustomed to a last night rendition of her latest poetic offering , not only displaying exceptional talent but also humourous observation.
The Dales Way
There’s a famous explorer called Walton
Who….. looking for further amusement
Decided to walk the Dales Way.
He got all his clients around him
And said “Eee, I’ve got an idea
I’m off to put wind up them Yorkshire folk
And need someone to bring up the rear.”
So 14 old codgers and Dodja
Looking for fresh air and fun
Set off in a bus up to Yorkshire
Wondering “what the hell have I done?”
The campsite itself was quite lovely
And soon pulses started to race
But Yorkshire put wind up the clients
Blowing tents all over the place.
The gale showed no sign of abating
And our tents were beginning to shake
But the Staff weighed them down quite firmly
As luckily…. Ann had brought cake!
Eventually the sun decided to shine
And the walk finally got underway
80 miles in total they said
If you believed what our leader did say.
The Staff looked after the Clients
The Clients made fun of the staff
But we got on so well together
We did nowt but walk and laugh.
The food it was tasty and filling
with fry-ups, packed lunches and occasional chips
But some survived on lattes and seeds
And liquorice to give them the sh*ts.
The Clients got on well together
But if anyone made a faux-pas
A cloth cap was produced for the culprit
Tho’ Steve reckoned the joke went too far.
We had bridges and stiles, going on for miles
Dead birds, trapped lambs and wild flowers.
It was too cold to sleep and too hot to walk
And my sister moaned on for hours.
So sadly we’ve had our final day
It’s our very last night in the camp
The Yorkshire dream is finally over
And now, back home we must tramp.
I hope the Dales enjoyed having us
With our loud voices, laughter and flat caps
Tho’ the local papers headline tonight is….
ILKLEY MOOR BARS TWATS!